Tuesday, September 30, 2014

3 Mistakes (& Learning’s) of My Life !!

We keep facing incidents in life which will be lesson for us in various forms. However, some events will remain in your heart , keep reminding you to become a better person . This are some important lessons, which haunts me on regular intervals..!!

Learning 1:

Sometime in 1990’s.
Hey, why no one is joining today? I was enquiring with one of my friends in neighbourhood. It was a routine for us to meet in ground after school hours and play for some time. Reply was -Today was  birthday of a guy in our locality and some are invited for treat at his home. Oh, I was not aware, might have got missed, and pacified myself. Sometime later friends came home calling for his treat; I told was not aware, but joined the event unsolicited.

At party, I realised it was a small affair, for limited people and I was never meant to be invited. Well its fine I told again myself. Had cakes & snacks, of course, dinner, which I felt was too spicy,& went home happily. 

Next day, at playground, the birthday celebration was spoken in his presence.  Not sure why I did that, but commented about the spicy food, which we had for dinner. His face changed and I realised my blunder. An Uninvited guest, free food and making unwarranted comment!!

Learning I got Never go to an uninvited place, and if gone for whatsoever reason, don’t comment on anything, since we have no right to comment after having free food as an unwelcomed person, barging in to a private function.

Learning 2:

Sometime in 1st decade of 2000.
It was a hectic day. Failed in an interview (though intention was to make some money during vacation, which HR found out & rejected!!), got stuck in heavy rain while coming back and of course namma Bengaluru traffic Jam. By the time I reached home drenched, entire day was gone. 

As I enter the home, land-line rang. Friend was on call. He had been my buddy for years now. Had privilege of seeing coffee days, using mobile phones for first time, visiting new areas of Bengaluru, all thanks to him !! As I was completely stressed out that day, I was not in mood to speak, rather frustration was building up. But he continued speaking in his natural jolly mood even after knowing my situation. 

In bit of rage, I expressed displeasure of talking at that point of time, but it was in discourteous words.

That’s it!! I have not heard from him from past 10 + yrs. Initially I didn’t mind, but later years, I felt guilty, apologetic for being rude to him. Lost his phone number in some transition, have searched for him in social sites but in vain and hunt still continues.

Learning I got – Never speak in rage, and if spoken, don’t be egoistic in apologizing before it’s too late. Spoken Words & Broken Hearts cannot be rectified!!

Learning 3:

Sometime between 2004 – 2010
Hey Sharath, need your help. I have one campus interview to attend, can you please drop me. I did so, and waited in his college campus for him to finish the interview and drop him back. After all, he was one of my good buddies for many years now. 

He got job in a big MNC, life moved on for many years, until one day he called me. I had one rarely used, but well maintained two wheeler at home, and he wanted me to sell that to him, for his younger brother. 

Looking at his financial commitments & conditions, agreed to give my vehicle, but not by selling, instead free. Only condition was, he has to maintain it well and return it to me when he doesn’t want. Before handing over, I serviced it and gave.

Ten months later, got a call, saying he is no more need of it and would like to return.  Without clue on what I will be facing, I agreed.  As I saw my vehicle being brought back by him, heart sank. It was damaged on a side, from mudguard to tail lamp, full of dust, and webs. He had not even cleaned it before passing back. Insurance was lapsed long back, didn’t bother to renew it. 

I was badly hurt to see it in that condition, since it was with great interest and persuading, I had bought it and maintained. When questioned, he didn’t have proper answer and before I could recover from shock, he had left the place.

I spent some thousands to service, but never got its original shape. Finally disposed it off, free of cost to a deserving & eligible person, who wanted to make use of it.

Few months later, when met in a program asked him, if his deed was good. He argued that nothing was damaged, and he has returned it in same condition he had got. I felt pathetic and kept quiet. After few days, he called to take my bank account number; with assurance of transferring the amount I had spent to repair it.  It never got credited, as expected.

That was the last interaction I had, after that it became a courtesy smile if met on occasions and his priorities changed. Recently heard, he has grown in career, with high income, luxury car & hi-tech gadgets. Nothing thrilled me to know about his growth, but felt sympathetic and pity for him for running away from a friend who had helped him in different situations, for sake of few thousands..!! 

It was also a lesson to me, to not trust by face value, since money can change people in different directions. Also learnt, never give your personal assets to any one, because for them it will never have that personal responsibility and it will also end up in loosing relationships.



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